This summer we each took small trips with one daughter at a time to places that are loved destinations in our families. What a special thing to do.
Time alone like this celebrates ritual, and creates new memories at the same time. How wonderful to have time to be together with no other personalities or pulls to distract us or make things more complicated. This is a sure fire way to deepen the connection and communication between you and your child.
We tend to focus so much on “family time” and being all together. So many parents resist splitting up the family and doing separate things. Our advice is don’t resist. Carve out and ritualize time with each child, not just by taking an afternoon or evening together, but a few days together, apart from the rest of the family and all the responsibilities and dynamics. It does not take away from the family as a whole, it nurtures it!
My parents insisted on doing everything as a family growing up. They were so focused on making our lives equal and fair that we missed out on having special individual time with each parent. This is helpful to hear and a reminder that it is OK to break off with one child periodically – that this practice does not take away from your family but is actually beneficial.